Current:Home > InvestCharli XCX, Jameela Jamil chose to keep friends as roommates. It's not that weird. -StockSource
Charli XCX, Jameela Jamil chose to keep friends as roommates. It's not that weird.
View
Date:2025-04-19 15:30:08
For decades, Americans grew up with the dream of one day owning and moving into a house with their spouse or significant other. A white picket fence, front yard, kids − maybe even a dog.
Some people, however, are expanding that vision by opting to live with their friends, even when having roommates isn't a financial necessity. It's even taken hold among some celebrities. In 2021, Jameela Jamil shared on X that she and her longtime partner, musician James Blake, live with two of their best friends.
"Living with my three best friends still, even into my mid thirties is the single greatest feeling on earth," Jamil wrote. "I love these people. I thought by now life would be traditional. I hope we all, always live together. I hope we all grow old in a little British commune together."
In a housing market where owning a home seems more and more out-of-reach, living with friends has become the norm for many. Experts say it also signals a shift in how society views friendships. Instead of sidelining friends to prioritize family, many are instead valuing their friends as much as they do their families − and choosing to organize their lives accordingly. Doing so can be key in combatting loneliness, which has become an epidemic.
"When we were younger, we lived with our friends in college, which many of us remember as the happiest time in our lives, and then you grew up and the American dream becomes getting a single-family home, which is often quite far away from your friends, quite far away from your family," says Liz Moody, a wellness writer who previously discussed this topic on her show "The Liz Moody Podcast." "We're feeling those isolation effects with the increasing loneliness rates and the epidemic of loneliness that's happening in this country."
More:Are 'provider women' the opposite of 'trad wives'? They're getting attention on TikTok.
Charli XCX, Jameela Jamil and other stars have chosen to live with roommates
Jamil isn't the only celebrity who's chosen to live with friends. Charli XCX told Architectural Digest in 2019 she lived with three people − two of whom are childhood friends − in her home in Los Angeles.
“I feel like it’s the people in your home that make it a home,” the pop star said. “The house feels very full and lively, so we get to meet a lot of other creative people just through the house. I really enjoy that, and I think that’s part of the reason why the house is what it is.”
Additionally, Margot Robbie told news.com.au in 2016 she and her then-boyfriend (now husband) Tom Ackerley had four roommates in their London flat, even as films like "The Wolf of Wall Street," "Suicide Squad" and "The Legend of Tarzan" shot her to fame.
Moody says this demonstrates how having roommates isn't always about finances. Sometimes, it's for simple companionship. After all, she says, celebrities get lonely too.
"Celebrities are just as lonely and sometimes even more so than the rest of us. We pedestal them, and we think they have these incredibly glamorous lives, but those lives are often isolating them even further from other people," she says. "Human connection is the most vital thing to our health and to our mental health, and celebrities aren't exempt from that."
It's not just celebrities who are choosing to live with friends either. Rhaina Cohen, the author of the book "The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center," says she and her husband have lived together with various friends over the past three years in Washington, D.C.
More:College students are going viral on TikTok for luxury dorm room makeovers. You won't believe it.
Even though it was cheaper for she and her husband to live alone in their rent-stabilized apartment, she says what they've gained by moving in with friends has been invaluable.
"Friends can rise to the level of the people that you would build your life around," she says. "A romantic partner is not the only person who you can choose to go through major life milestones together or entangle parts of your life like your finances and the home you share. So I think for a lot of people, it's questioning what we're told is the right way to do things, and then looking at their own preferences instead."
Sexless marriages are a serious problem.We need to talk about it.
Though Cohen prefers living with her husband as well as friends, she understands it's not for everyone − and that's OK. What's important, she says, is that people know living with friends is an option.
"I really am not trying to say that this is a better way for people to live. People have really different preferences," Cohen says. "I just think it's something that has not been taken seriously. It's not been on the table. And that part is changing."
More:Is 'going no contact' the secret to getting your ex back? Maybe — but be careful.
Why live with friends?
For those who do live with friends, there are many benefits − but also things to be mindful of.
Psychotherapist Stephanie Sarkis says it's important to choose friends as roommates who share your values and have compatible lifestyles.
"It's not for everybody, but I think that for many people it is having somebody they can check in with at the beginning and end of the day. They can find comfort in maybe sharing a meal together," she says, adding that roommates "can really reduce that chance of the feeling of loneliness."
More:Relationship experts say these common dating 'rules' are actually ruining your love life
Moody says living with friends also reorients the way you connect. For many who live alone, it takes time and effort to arrange meetups with friends, especially if they live far away. When you actually do get together, most of this time is spent catching up on everything that's happened in your lives since your last visit.
When your friends are your roommates, however, you can connect more over the here and now.
"The things that build connections and deepen relationships are living your life together," Moody says. "It's going grocery shopping together. It's making dinner together. It's doing work dates together. It's gardening together. It's playing basketball together. It's actually living life together. So you're building those memories, and living communally provides myriad opportunities to do so."
veryGood! (2316)
Related
- Stamford Road collision sends motorcyclist flying; driver arrested
- Princess Kate announces she has cancer in video message. What's next for the royal family?
- King Charles III Shares Support for Kate Middleton Amid Their Respective Cancer Diagnoses
- Federal judge temporarily blocks plans for a power line in Mississippi River wildlife refuge
- Jorge Ramos reveals his final day with 'Noticiero Univision': 'It's been quite a ride'
- Q&A: Extreme Heat, Severe Storms Among Key Climate Challenges for Maryland’s New Chief Resilience Officer
- New York State Legislature Votes to Ban CO2 Fracking, Closing a Decade-Old Loophole in State Law
- Carlee Russell pleads guilty and avoids jail time over fake kidnapping hoax, reports say
- What do we know about the mysterious drones reported flying over New Jersey?
- It's Final Four or bust for Purdue. Can the Boilermakers finally overcome their March Madness woes?
Ranking
- Jorge Ramos reveals his final day with 'Noticiero Univision': 'It's been quite a ride'
- 2 Black officers allege discrimination at police department
- NCAA Tournament winners and losers: Kentucky's upset loss highlights awful day for SEC
- Messi still injured. Teams ask to postpone Inter Miami vs. NY Red Bulls. Game will go on
- Louvre will undergo expansion and restoration project, Macron says
- With all the recent headlines about panels and tires falling off planes, is flying safe?
- Pair of massive great white sharks surface off Florida coast within a minute of each other
- Every 'Ghostbusters' movie, ranked from worst to best (including the new 'Frozen Empire')
Recommendation
Highlights from Trump’s interview with Time magazine
Chemotherapy: A quick explainer in light of Princess Kate's cancer diagnosis
U.K. cracks down on synthetic opioid 10 times stronger than fentanyl causing overdoses in Europe
2 Black officers allege discrimination at police department
What were Tom Selleck's juicy final 'Blue Bloods' words in Reagan family
California doubles water allocation for most contractors following February storms
What is '3 Body Problem'? Explaining Netflix's trippy new sci-fi and the three-body problem
Refresh and Rejuvenate With 20 Self-Care Deals From the Amazon Big Spring Sale Starting at $5